Blow the candles out!

Never in my wildest dreams did I think I was going to spend a birthday in a war-torn country, but God works miracles, doesn't he?  Even though I would have been celebrating it somewhere in downtown Seattle clubbing and drinking it up, (probably doing something I would regret later after seeing the photo on Facebook) it definitely wasn't bad here.  

The lead up to my birthday (although quiet) started off with making smores and listening to a marine sing crazy stories on the guitar...

Woke up and wrote the schedule, went to softball and played the actual Base Command Group Team.  They didn't have 18 players show up like we did, so they weren't able to sub in when they wanted to... beat them 9-6.  Asked to do a rematch and kicked their butts 23-0 (and I finally scored two runs on this team).  'Bush league' of us, Chief called it.

Almost spoiled a surprise, but I got a funny card from Puddy (we go back to the FRS) with what used to be a valentines day card--its all they sell here on this side of the airfield--and a bag full of candy.  As if I need more.  Such thoughtful people.  Pecker said he was even gonna give me a card too... quite possibly a cake!

Doc picked me up and I got to ride the ambulance for the first time.  I lit up the sirens as soon as we were free from most of the hangars and honked the horn before we turned into the Turkish restaurant.  I enjoyed the aromatic preview of the food we were taking to the movie.  Indulged in my 10 minutes of European MTV and headed to the theater to watch Avatar.

Got to the theater and ate half our chicken kabobs outside the door and saw the movie man run upstairs with the VHS of Avatar.  We experienced an hour of technical difficulties (and opening credits of Super Troopers) before they realized the VCR needed to be swapped out.  But it was ok because Muffs joined us and we spent the whole hour gossiping and venting.  Quality girl time, yes?

Before hittin the sack, I watched the last half of the Colts vs Jets game and enjoyed my cup of tea. 

It wasn't until I called my sister and started breaking down that I realized I was really missing family then and there.  I get a hot feeling in my face and my tears start rolling before I figure out that I need to hang up...

It is now WAY past my bedtime, and I'm going to start the grind up tomorrow once again.  Now that I got that "Quarter of a Century" out of the way... I had better be 25% more productive tomorrow.  Or rather... today.

Til the next...

Preview

Coming soon to a theater near you... sooner than you think.

Afternoon

All I hear out everybody around here is "Afternoon," or "Morning," or even just "Ma'am"... have we gotten so lazy that we're shortening the greetings now? What the heck does "Afternoon" mean to me anyway? Are you telling me that its afternoon? You won't even wish me a good afternoon? It's more of just a way to announce to everyone that you know what time of day it is, or that you are being that smart ass telling everyone what time of day it is.

And folks,  that's what really grinds my gears.

Also the first dust storm I have ever experienced was this very day, followed by a bit of light rain.  I drove through it all for some KFC, but it really wasn't worth it.

100110

Binary numbers? Try today's date.
Still making mistakes writing the dates out, 2010 is such an odd year, yeah? We're all so used to writing 9's or 0's in sequence and suddenly...

Just when I fear that I am losing my femininity being Miss Flightsuit, I get a complimenting Christmas card from one of the Ugandan gate guards checking IDs at the DFAC.  A nice card (and in almost perfect English)... and one to Amy as well from another guard-- deserves a nice New Year card back, right? So, to be cordial, we both write cards from the same pack and deliver them while going to breakfast.

Two days later, after a day's work, there is an envelope stuck in my door addressed to LT Vanessa.  I open it, enclosed is a note taken from a flower-shaped notepad.  The note tells me that he is hoping I am having a good day and that he would like to meet outside of chow to talk sometime, or maybe to have lunch.  Write me at this email address.

I'm getting admirer notes? In uniform?? This is the first proven incident.

At first I am thinking... "This guy knows where I live??" At the time (1-2 weeks ago ish) our names were clearly labeled on the outside of our doors, so I thought he just paid a lot of attention to how my last name spelled out on my desert name tag.  Turns out, after I brought the situation to Amy's attention, she was the one who stuck the note on my door.  The guard, who will remain nameless, handed it to Amy to give to me.  What's great (sarcastically) is that we have to see these guards everyday, so there's no escaping.  But I proceeded to go with my initial idea: Pretend like I never got the note.

About three days later, I was almost late to duty, so I walked to breakfast alone.  Strength in numbers, I always said, but this time I couldn't help the situation unless I wanted to be hungry for 3 hours.  After I cleared my weapon, I saw that the guard was not him.  But after I showed my ID and began walking in, I hear "LT!" over my shoulder and lo and behold, its him running to me to ask me how my day is going.  From what I can remember I told him I was tired.  He guessed, 'Gym?' I said, just flying (white lie).  I walked faster, knowing I was going to have to get a take-out box anyway so relief fell over my face.  As I opened the door, he handed me an envelope.  Great, I thought.  Another one. 
  "You wrote me a note?"
  "Yes."
  "You wrote this note."
  "Yes."
  "For me?"
  "Yes."
So I was basically making sure that he was writing this note to me, showing that I was surprised by his move.  He followed me inside, and I told him okay.  I continued in, got a take-out box, still on a hurried pace, got my food, never looked behind me and left.

Basically the same note... told me his email address and his English is a little forceful but of course being a girl, I will read into these things (I need a time to meet... I know you are busy because of your position... write me at this email...) and be a little creeped out.  I have kept the same manner in showing my ID to get in, saying hi, but nothing has changed.  I am finding myself, however, making sure that I am talking with somebody else while having my ID checked, as to not be interrupted.  Silly, I know.  But when he does catch me, I'll have to tell him I don't have time, I cannot write, and its nothing personal.  I wonder if he'll get that cliche.  Who knows?  I just don't think it's fair I have to be the subject because I am one out of [enter single digit number here] females here on the base's southside.

Today, I blew the third of my wall outlets out, also burning my lights.  In doing so, I had no other options but to visit Billeting.  In there, is James, a black man who looks to be the age of 30, smile on his face and all.  Very nice guy, funny, says hi to me all the time at the DFAC.  The second time I go into the office b/c they locked my room up, he tells me he hopes I'm not offended when he says it, but I am a very beautiful woman.  I am in a freakin flight suit.  Really? Because he's a civilian, he feels he can say it.  First off, I'm not even good with compliments in spite of your position--civilian or military.  I told him thank you, but later he makes this comment about our first date being a fix-it appointment in my room.  Incident number two. 

It's because there are a limited supply of females and we are high vis, high target.  It was going to happen even if we were ugly-to-average looking. 

Gaaahh.  Maybe I should stop wearing makeup and chop the hair.  I really do need to chop the hair.  Really.

Okay, that was a fun-filled workday consisting of 3 hours at work total and no flying.  The rest... connecting with the outside world (6 mile run with Amy) and figuring out ways to avoid talking to boys I don't want to know.

That'll be all.

SUN

Beginning (or End?) of a Decade

Bringing in the new year with a Montecristo cigar, Cup 'O Noodles, and "chardonnay" cider... and calls to the east coast (despite the fact they were 8 hours from midnight) was completely different from last year's celebration, of which I spent with my one and only baby sister on the streets and clubs of downtown D.C., uncomfortably surrounded by what looked to be the city's own Asian mafias... from a large social celebration to a peaceful private celebration in my room...

I really don't want to feel down in the dumps, and I don't, but every time a major shift happens such as a new year, graduation, or marriage, its hard not to think about the fact that I always manage to go stag to every celebration.  Plus, being deployed is a totally different way to be separated... All these guys are new people, I am not attached; people I know from high school are mostly married and parenting (or expecting;) its just such a dynamic thing to hear about every single update when I check FB -- if it wasn't for Skype, I wouldn't be able to call or video chat with my parents as much as I had originally anticipated.

No need to get worried, folks.  I'm just thinking again... and you know what happens when people think--things get said, or things happen.  Well, something like five months left... time went by fast, but still 150 more days left?! I really have to commit to this "reading books" thing I was going to do while I was out here, not burning my eyes into the screen of the computer watching movies.

Felice Anno Nuovo

And So the Legend Was Born

I just [re]learned the history of how I came to be.

For tonight's entertainment, we picked up "filipino" food at the DFAC, brought it back to the Ready Room, and watched Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

Found this to be interesting.

Obviously, I find much more humor than this guy did.  I can laugh about it, I can laugh at myself, which makes it not painful at all.

I have embraced the call sign, therefore, I am afraid it will be taken away soon.  Shorty was growing. 


Let's see how long this thing can last before I do something outrageously stupid to earn another one.

Live Simple.

To be deployed is to learn to live 'simple'.  Real Simple, like the magazine that I had subscribed to for a year, except this kind of living is only the simple kind and can't be complicated any more by infomercials, telemarketers, and other influential outliers.  No distractions disguised as flashing lights and expensive things.

While the personal letters have been coming in slowly, I have been so honored as to receive a couple of forwarded loan payment letters and bills for the house I'm not currently sleeping in.  To get bills and payment letters for a lifestyle you aren't even living is like getting a free book in a foreign language... you just don't care.  If the electricity in my room goes out without notice, you know the power outage is only because they need to run maintenance in order to keep it going for the few residents we are living south of the runways.  I walk to work rather than driving 10-15 minutes like I did on the Rock (Whidbey Island).  I pass the gym, chapel, mini mart, and the laundry drop-off/pick-up facility on the way to headquarters.  Yes, you're right, I said it's a drop-off/pick-up facility.  So to emphasize how simple life has been made to focus our undying attention on the war itself, our laundry is done for us.  Our food is made for us.  Sure, cooking and doing laundry may be a perishable skill, but we can't stop flying either--another perishable skill... I digress.

I have no television in my room, I catch glimpses of football scores and indie music videos on the screens of the DFAC (dining facility) while I enjoy a hot meal and dessert on the side.  I study during the day and read a little of my "smart" books in my room before turning in to an episode of How I Met Your Mother or my newly acquired DVD set of Entourage, Seasons 1-4.  The difference between here and home is the amount of things 'to do' on the list of lists.

To close off the blog, the OPSO and MO here just received in the mail 2 packages containing a blender, chickpeas, tahini, and various ingredients to make hummus.  How awesome is that? They plugged it in and just started mixing and blending away.  And with that... they had hummus.

Until next time.

Basic gifts

An elephant from Thailand that a retired Seabee gave me because he could.

An Iraq box which will soon become my smoking box.

A package of M&Ms which will become my Christmas sweet.

(and yes I am aware that the picture is backwards, it was a photobooth-ism, just hold a mirror to the screen and you can read it correctly)

Perceptions

Fighting to stay awake...

I have been wanting to blog about how this whole journey has been so far, but I could never find enough time in my room to sit down and do it.  But now I can because of two reasons: a) I am not flying or have duty tomorrow; and b) I am no longer sharing a room with someone.  But I don't want to write something long and runny, so I'll try to keep it faster, funnier.

So far, this experience has been different than any other that I've had.  I am continuing to learn things about myself: how I perceive in the midst of others and how others perceive me as a newcomer into an already established community of people.  I tell you, it is very encouraging to hear people say that they like you, with the words mostly coming from the seasoned chiefs and warrant officers.  Oftentimes, though, I question the validity behind their kind words, because I feel like I recognize them as the common encouraging and motivating statements used to butter up your peers to make them feel good about themselves--not necessarily because its true, but to improve morale and production within the workplace.  I never thought it would unnerve me, but like I said, it's different.

We're deployed.  Everyone is away from family and friends, which will be prominent in the next few months when we start going through more holidays in the calendar.  I still can't even believe I bought a house like I did and after living in it for 2 weeks I'm out the door to fight a war in the middle east.  The friends that I had had also made the journey with me all the way up to graduation.  Many of us started in API at Pensacola before we had even met up on the island.  This is the first real duty station where I had to adjust to a completely new set of characters and talents in a setting unfamiliar to these characters.  It's also different this time--I'm used to introducing myself with my personality.  Now, its the FNG who knows absolutely nothing and has to learn it all on the fly.

I can't believe I'm ranting.  Where are the good parts?? Don't worry, I'm just calling out pros and cons... but I'm falling asleep.  Til next post to follow up...

Retail Therapy kicked in... desert style

-Rugs to warm up the metal can
-Kettle for warm water when it gets cold
-Movies: Law Abiding Citizen, Men Who Stare at Goats, Year One, Ninja Assassin, The Blind Side, Inglourious Basterds
-New CDs: Shakira's She Wolf, The Beatles' Revolver, Rihanna's Rated R, John Mayer's Battle Studies, Timbaland's Shock Value II
-And a Christmas Present I won't open until the 25th... Homedics Foot Spa! For tired feet!

When I have more time and it isn't almost 5am, I will start to blog what you all have been wondering... life here in the desert. But for now, I must get some rest for it will be a long night once my eyes open later this evening...

2 Short Logs from the air base in the desert

Wednesday 25 Nov 2009 (+3)
Today is the first day in Iraq. With six days of “pre-deployment” across the Atlantic spent in D.C., Lajes Field, and Sigonella, the day has finally arrived. Coming in as -2 of a section approach passing through 4000 feet overcast, this base has so far impressed me. Airborne, it is huge. The north side of the runway is filled with buildings that I will have to time to explore. Supposedly there’s a Subway, Pizza hug, Coffee shop and all – but the Dining Facilities (DFAC) are free! Guess it depends on if I get sick of hot meals…
These “cans” we stay in are like mini college dorms. Bunk beds and a closet to each person… not bad. Except I left my keys to the trunk padlocks at HOME – stupid move. I actually had to break into my own trunk locker. Then I had to tackle the gun holster assembly, too. Reading od directions are pretty difficult. It was nice when we got in today (a grueling 5+45 flight), we ate cake from a re-enlistment, went to the DFAC, and enjoyed “Roll’em”, the squadron’s way of having movie night. Star Trek. Good movie. Just learned I’m on the night shift, so I’m going to wake up at 9:30am and workout, hit up chow, then study/look busy. My roommate is the incomparable Intel officer, Amy Hough. She is known for working 20 hour days by her own choosing and merit. Academy grad, she’s a force to be reckoned with—its kind of intimidating because she’s the same rank, yet she actually is a professional at what she does… at least I think so. Anyways, its 1:29AM and I’m still working on Italy time zone. Must work on the routine. My guitar and new keyboard and here and will be opened shortly. ☺

Happy Thanksgiving!
Thursday 26 Nov 2009
Woke up today at 9:30 AM. Snoozed for 30 minutes because I was afraid of waking Amy. Turns out she wasn’t even in there sleeping. With the shades down it feels like nighttime every time the lights go off, which makes it easy to sleep! I felt guilty sleeping in so late, but I’m trying to stay as nocturnal as possible to get ready for flying at night. I’m a little nervous for flying on goggles because I lack so much experience. Guess this is how you get it.
Did more exploring today. Went to the gym at an off-peak hour (10:30am) and got lazy for the good shower. I settled for the closest head which was an icy cold one. I’m going to think about showering before bed now. Tried to go the NEX, forgot my ID. ☹ Take 2 tomorrow. I hear a jet coming in for the break! Whoa… ADD. Anyways, the DFAC served turkey at LUNCH – I the first two meals today, and my Thanksgiving consisted of a burrito and beef fajita! Mexican thanksgiving? Haha. Oh, I feel like a POS JO for the moment – I got told maintenance found my green flashlight lens in a jet. FAIL.

Electric Shock

I haven't felt this upset about something. I also haven't 'confronted' somebody about about how I felt... I usually am one to let things go and dissolve on its own. I haven't cried in SUCH a long time.

And I actually cried a lot this evening.

I feel like a big part of it was my fault, a long time coming. Not being as aggressive and open as I could be.

My eyes are pretty puffy. But like I said, it was a long time coming.

Glee

Tony Horton just requested that I be his friend on Facebook!

And nobody knew that as I was going through P90X I put my status as In a Relationship... which I was referring to as Mr Tony Horton because I saw him every single day!

:) I can restart the program now :)

I had to write this down to remember it

I just started playing softball in April for the first time, thanks to my baseball playing roommate, Adam. He had some background playing for school and trying out for the Diamondbacks. I would have never thought of playing, but the thought of it sounded good. It was very hard to get people to play volleyball, let alone tennis, so since there was a softball thing going on I thought, "What could it hurt to try it?"

I think I have come a long way since April. I would have to say I am glad I am a coachable person and I have learned a lot from the people on the team and around the field. Some of my teammates have played in high school, some have coached teams, others have had little experience and wanted to try something different. I used to bat poorly, but I have learned some tricks on the way and I hardly ever strike out. No one wears protection on the field (and this is most important for catchers who get balls thrown at their heads, chest, hands, and shins) but we play a safe game.

The rules are more than halfway there in my sports memory bank, but I am still learning. Playing softball made me appreciate watching baseball a lot more. Today, I finally was trusted to tagging out the other team at home plate 3 times. We weren't able to score enough runs to beat the opponents, but I received compliments about my catching I've never gotten before.

I am going to keep learning and getting better... there's nothing that I can't do if I don't try.

<3/4>

Prowler Flight Numero Uno: SF-0

After such a wonderful Vegas getaway (which I will have to revisit sometime and post G-rated pictures), I was scheduled for my very first EA-6B flight. Needless to say, I wasn't quite so nervous for this familiarization flight, but after my original front seat crew cancelled due to large crosswinds on deck, I was pulled onto a BAM flight with 2 LtColonels and a Colonel as my instructor... talk about lots of Marine brass!

My first go at it ended up being a hot switch with the jet already in the pits waiting to be refueled, so I skipped the pre-flight for the first go around. My last flight in a tactical jet (the mighty T-2 Buckeye) was mid-July, so about a year out of the gear in addition to being out of the clouds.

The backseat button pushing came to me a lot easier than actually strapping in. Typically the jets and the 40 lb gear is manufactured favoring the male anatomy. While we refueled I unstrapped and strapped in again, this time in way less time than the first time. Flying above the clouds and doing the maneuvers (like wingovers and barrel rolls) immediately put me back to the ACM in VT-86. It's always the first flight like this that makes me rethink aviation, but the more hours I get, the more I get used to it (even if I end up throwing up into a ziploc, haha).

I've got to remember to keep an eye on the horizon tomorrow when I go for the 2nd go around... it's extremely difficult to keep up with the flying when the backseaters can only see out of the side windows and up. I can get the location of the jet on our displays but having to watch out over my shoulder is going to get some used to. Also the unloading of the jet is something I haven't experienced too much since last year, although I think the USAirways pilot who took us back to Seattle this past weekend scared half the passengers by making some weird erratic movements immediately after takeoff--then the kid next to me with his intelligence informed me they usually take off and cut an engine, do a restart once they've cleared big cities like Las Vegas. I didn't even know that. I don't even know if its true. But who knows?

So the debrief was done during engine shutdown, I walked down the boarding ladder and my puke bag fell out of my leg pocket. A plane captain kindly informed me and chuckled. Surely they see this sort of thing all the time! Right..?! Ah, doesn't bother me. One flight hour at a time.

Dusty Diamonds, then Lavish Lotions

I would just like to share the day I had today.

I had the opportunity to drive my mother to the airport this morning to see her off to Washington, D.C. and then drive onto Interstate Highway 5 where I would eventually end up in Oak Harbor for a long day of classes and studying.

Immediately merging onto the interstate, I was able to escape a near vehicle merge, saving myself from a horrible accident. But life got a little better when I arrived at home a whole hour before work started, so I was given a chance to eat breakfast at home. Also, I was given a chance to hear my cat crying out for me from inside a closed bedroom.

With no opportunity to get to his kitty litterbox, he laid a nice fresh one in the center of my bed spread. Thank goodness it was easy to clean up.

Off to work, I'm falling asleep in the classroom before we start. One of my classmates has an extra Starbucks Soy Mocha latte (intended for a girl he liked) and he offers it to my sleepy self. Saved with sugar and caffeine.

After being really military like, I save myself for the second role of the day, the softball game. Time to get into gear and throw like a girl, catch like a boy, and run like a lunatic. We ended up tying the game at the last inning, going into sudden death (extra inning) and losing by one. Way to be one of the boys, I was the only girl out there. Totally used to it. Oh and by the way, we have gotta have the coolest games ever... How often do you get military jets flying overhead in formation every ten minutes while you're playing a little ball? It's really quite awesome how commonplace it is, plus it looks cool playing baseball with planes taking off in the background.

I get home for dinner, and its finally time to relax. One thing I love is that I can totally feel at ease with males and then be able to come home and become a girl. After a luxurious spa day with my mother, I have inherited more yummy and sweet smelling products and go absolutely crazy. Now I smell great and I'm about to head into bed and start the day all over again, exactly how this one went.

I love that I can still be a girl, but play in a man's world.

One of my fav passages from New Moon

'"You're impossible," he said, and he laughed once--a hard laugh, frustrated. "How can I put this so that you'll believe me? You're not asleep, and you're not dead. I'm here, and I love you. I was thinking of you, seeing your face in my mind, every second that I was away. When I told you that I didn't want you, it was the very blackest kind of blasphemy."' --Edward

-From Stephenie Meyer's New Moon

Squadron walk

As I walked out of the hangar at 10:30 pm from a late simulator event, it was a walk reminiscent of the ones I used to make walking into VT-86. The air was hot, humid, and splattered with noises of maintenance in the background.

I may have time warped back to Florida. We reached a high of 80+ degrees here in the northernmost area of the continental US.

Life is good in the Navy. We have some weird hours, but at least I don't sit around and veg all day on my couch.

I hold these sacred.
Without them, I would be helpless.
I would not be able to express
My joy
My fears
My anger
My pain
My strength
My soul
My heart
My love
My hate
Myself.

Invaluable. Vital.
Sacred.